30 Signs That You’re One of Those “Crazy Preppers”

by | Jun 24, 2014 | Headline News | 220 comments

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    The following article has been contributed by our good friend Daisy Luther of The Organic Prepper. Check out her web site for preparedness insights, healthy eating and news you need to know. If you are just getting started on your preparedness journey or want to enhance your food storage supplies we encourage you to read Daisy’s book The Pantry Primer: How to Build a One Year Food Supply in Three Months.

    With all the recent talk in the news about “Doomsday Preppers” and the demonization in the media, you have to be aware that you’re considered a little….different. The fact that you are self-reliant is such an oddity to most that, frankly, they find you to be either nuts, a little bit scary, or both. According to the US government, we are all extremists on the verge of committing depraved acts of terrorism.

    Here are the top 30 signs, should you ever be the subject of a nationwide manhunt, that you too will be considered a “Crazy Prepper on the Loose“:

    1. Pantries are so mainstream…you have food stashed in strange places in every room of the house.
    2. You have enough toilet paper to get through a year of uncomfortable digestive upsets…occurring with 6 people simultaneously
    3. Speaking of which, you possess at least 3 different ways to use the bathroom, only one of which is an actual bathroom.
    4. Your kids know what OPSEC means…at the age of 4.
    5. You have topographical maps of your area…plural.
    6. When you’re forced to interact with “the others” you feel like you are awkwardly censoring your true opinions
    7. You think nothing of treating an injury or illness yourself because “what if there was no doctor?”
    8. Paintball is no longer just a fun way to spend an afternoon – it’s called “training”.
    9. With every major purchase, you contemplate going for the off-grid version.
    10. You have more manual tools than power tools.
    11. You’ve washed entire loads of laundry by hand for either necessity or practice. (And not just your dainties…we’re talking about jeans and stuff!)
    12. Your kids are not afraid of guns…or fingers pointed like guns…or pastries in the shape of guns…or drawings of guns.
    13. When house hunting you look for multiple heat and water sources.
    14. You store food in buckets…lots of buckets…like, maybe even a whole room full of buckets.
    15. You garden with a determination and time commitment normally reserved for endurance athletes training for an Ironman triathlon.
    16. If you don’t have a water source on your property, you have put in miles of footwork searching for one nearby, and have mapped multiple discreet routes to and from the source, and figured out how to haul the water back to your house on each route.
    17. Your first instinct when hearing about some event on the mainstream news is skepticism. (False flag event, anyone?)
    18. You believe that FEMA camps are real and that you are most likely on “The List”.
    19. Instead of CNN, you have alternative news sites bookmarked in your favorites on your computer.
    20. You have enough coffee/tea/favorite-caffeinated-item-of-choice to last you through 3 apocalypses.
    21. You have enough over the counter medications stashed away to outfit a small-town pharmacy.
    22. You have an instinctive mistrust of most cops or anyone working for an alphabet agency.
    23. You could sink a ship with the weight of your stored ammo.
    24. Looking for a fun weekend outing with the kids? Forget amusement parks –  the shooting range is where it’s at..
    25. When the power goes out, you calmly light the candles and proceed with whatever you had been dong previously.
    26. A longer-term power outage is called “practice”.
    27. If a like-minded person comes over to your house, they’ll realize you are “one of them” by seeing your reading material. Other folks won’t even notice. The FBI would call your copy of The Prepper’s Blueprint and your James Wesley Rawles fiction  ”subversive literature”.
    28. Your children carry a modified bug-out kit in their school backpacks.
    29. You can and dehydrate food with the single-minded fervor of a Amish grandmother facing a 7 year drought.
    30. Calling 911 is not part of your home security plan.

    What are some other habits or possessions that would have a wild-eyed picture of you on every news station in the country? Share in the comments section below.

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    The Pantry Primer

    Please feel free to share any information from this article in part or in full, giving credit to the author and including a link to The Organic Prepper and the following bio.

    Daisy Luther is the author of The Pantry Primer: How to Build a One Year Food Supply in Three Months.  Her website, The Organic Prepper, offers information on healthy prepping, including premium nutritional choices, general wellness and non-tech solutions. You can follow Daisy on Facebook and Twitter, and you can email her at [email protected]

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      220 Comments

      1. wrong

        Color me a domestic terrorist…….

        • Iowa

          Color me Christian and color me my Defense.. Really getting tired of this Shit.

          • Defiant

            Whenever I see obama on TV it reminds
            me I still need my septic tank pumped.

            • Agent Provocatour

              Oh don’t watch or listen that POS ! It’s like drinking the contents of your septic tank!

              • Unreconstructed Southron

                It’s like drinking Hillary’s septic tank.

                • Anonymous

                  Lol at this list…

                  #31. You gave Conflicted to everyone last Christmas.

                  http://conflictedthegame.com

                  Love that game. By the way Mac, I saw that drudge picked up your story before this one, that’s great man! Keep writing quality stuff. This website is my anchor to what’s happening in the preparedness world.

                  • Be informed

                    You know what is totally pathetic about this? A generation or two ago someone that prepared would have been considered a patriot, a real American. Why? Because they were preparing themselves for emergencies and taking the burden off of those that were helping after a disaster to those that really need it like the elderly and handicapped.

                    Now these ass monkeys consider anyone that is preparing for emergencies, even hurricanes, earthquakes, or other natural disasters to be stockpiling for an attack on the public. The sick perception that the worthless MSM and the even more worthless government has made preppers/survivalists look like is absolutely criminal.

                    DUH! you worthless zombie population. The prepper/survivalist is someone that is the backbone, the ONLY backbone to any type of recovery after a catastrophe. IF 100% failed to prepare, there are many scenarioes in which the human population could become extinct like the Dodo bird or Passenger Pigeon. The very survival of the human species could depend on those, the 1% that have stockpiled and prepared.

                    You know something else? The prepper/survivalist is someone that has not only planned for calamity with food, water, and other necessities, but also with knowledge and wisdom of just how they and others can survive and make what is left work for those still around after mega SHTF. Being mentally ready is much of the survival equation.

                    We all know which side of pure evil or sh$% stupid for brains that someone stands on with their worthless opinion AGAINST preparation and being ready for emergencies and disasters AND being AGAINST those that self sacrifice much for their families by choosing to be a prepper/survivalist.

                  • KY Mom

                    Daisy,

                    I must be one of those crazy preppers.

                    Be informed,

                    You make a very valid point.

                    In less than a generation, our society has turned AWAY from centuries of common sense and the values of being independent, self-reliant, prepared and hard working.

                    The weakening of America has been a multipronged effort – to weaken spiritually, morally, intellectually and physically. Our current society is a reflection of these changes.

                    Those ‘shaping’ America, have successfully encouraged most citizens to become DEPENDENT on … the government, medications, stores open 24/7, etc.

                    “America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves.”
                    –Abraham Lincoln

                    “You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich.
                    You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
                    You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
                    You cannot lift the wage earner up by pulling the wage payer down.
                    You cannot build character and courage by taking away people’s initiative and independence.
                    You cannot help people permanently by doing for them, what they could and should do for themselves.”
                    -William J. H. Boetcker

                    It comes as no surprise that the “45 Communist Goals for America” include:
                    -Discrediting the Bible
                    -Infiltrating the church
                    -Eliminating prayer
                    -Weakening the basic American institutions
                    -Discrediting the family
                    -Encouraging promiscuity and easy divorce,
                    -Getting control of the schools
                    -Discrediting the Constitution
                    -Belittle all forms of American culture
                    -Discourage the teaching of American history

              • sixpack

                “Oh don’t watch or listen that POS ! It’s like drinking the contents of your septic tank!”

                It’s worse — I have enough preps to purify toilet water…there is no way to make obama “fit for consumption.”

                • Shootit

                  I sure would have liked to see him survive in 1870. Prepping was how the west was settled and won, not to mention all the labor that was set forth to live. Such a LEACH.

                • DH Baughman

                  HOW TO DESTROY THE WEST ~ Vladimir Lenin, 1921 (Abridged)

                  How to destroy the West

                  Corrupt the young. Get them away from religion.

                  Encourage their interest in sex.

                  Make them superficial by focusing their attention on sports, sensual entertainments and other trivialities.

                  Always preach true democracy but seize power as fast and as ruthlessly as possible.

                  Encourage government extravagance, destroy it’s credit.

                  Produce disorders and foster lenient attitude toward disorders, by specious argument cause the breakdown of the old moral virtues:
                  honesty, sobriety, self-restraint.

                  Cause registration of firearms (to) leave the population defenseless.

                  ~ Vladimir Lenin, 1921 (Abridged)

            • Ranger

              Who’s this “Obama” you guys speak of? Never heard of him.

              • Anonymous

                Thats right, Beinformed.. My mom reminded me of a little squirrel, always putting things away for a rainy day. She lived through the depression and knew the value of prepping. Since she grew up on a large farm, with orchards, etc, they had no problem during the Great Depression. Indeed, others would come by and my grandparents loaded up their vehicles (whatever they drove in those days) with food. If it hadn’t been for people like my grandparents, how would a lot of people survived?!

              • Anonymous

                Unfortunately, Kmom, a lot of wealthy people got wealthy from nefarious activities (ripping the system and other people off!)

                There are parasites in every group, but I’ve found (from people I know) that the well-to-do (and even a lot of the middle class) are extremely corrupt and crooked, even stealing assets from their own family!

                So, please don’t give me that crap about poor people taking from the rich; its USUALLY the well-to-do and/or hard working scrums who steal from others. They aren’t content with their own money and things.. they want others stuff as well!

                I know many so called “hard working”people who are corrupt as hell… and some who are honest. Basically, you can’t judge people by little groups.

                I’m an older woman who gets $14 per month in food stamps and barely survive. I know this Mexian lady who gets over $100 per month in food stamps but has just had her house remodeled. Bums in all categories.

                • IMPCALGI

                  @ anonymous

                  Believe me you don’t need to convince me; for every welfare queen out there ripping off the system, there is an upper class parasite living in Washington who IS the system. Of all the TRILLIONS that have been spent in the so called “war on poverty”, most of it is spent on bureaucrats and overhead. That is why of the ten richest counties in America, EIGHT of them are clustered around DC. That’s also why, after 48 years of this “war on poverty”, poverty has won, and we the people have been ripped off the heartless bloodsucking drones who control not only Washington, but Wall Street and Hollywood as well. It’s also why the “safety net” is so full of holes: because of all the parasites out there at all levels who are using it as a hammock!

                  Ideals Mastering Power Creating All Life GOD IS

            • Retired Marine

              In the cat box (Afghanistan), some of the port-a-potties had writings indicating where to deposit obama dolls.

              • Anonymous

                UGH! EBOLA COULD SPREAD THROUGH OUT THE ENTIRE AFRICAN CONTINENT! (NEWS IN 2 MINUTES).

            • Jaques Merde

              I heard Obungle just ordered ten-thousand septic tanks–As soon as the UN troops get trained to drive them, they are going to invade US.

            • legal citzen

              i think the govt got caught doing something illegial
              or they screwed up
              either way obama is on the tube blaming someone else

            • Anonymous

              Ha, ha! I like number 24– where to take your kids for a fun outing! : )

              • sixpack

                I proudly represent all 30 of them.

                • Shootit

                  We had a TORNADO hit our place a few weeks ago and… The power went out and we went to bed… If the power is still out in the am I would have fired up the generator. No biggie. Did we call fema or 911? Na. Good night sleep and started cleanup in the am. All the neighbors showed up to help and the wife made lemonaide.

        • ready down under

          So what? I’m in good company! 🙂

          Aussie

          • Prepared Pastor

            It’s official. I’m not a prepper.

            • Nancy

              Why do you say this? Do you feel it is un-Christian to prepare? I’m glad Noah didn’t use this argument with God if this is what you believe.

            • Shootit

              Love your bs. We never prepare for anything. We just call 911 if the drive through at McDonald’s is slow.

        • Patriot One

          Gee I’m really screwed!! Color me Business Owner, Christian, Conservative, Pro Life, Veteran and I’m White! I’m Fucked!!

          • durango kidd

            No you are not fucked. You are locked and loaded and waiting for these MFR’s to draw first blood. After that its self defense.

            Engage. 🙂

            • Anonymous

              AMEN brother… If you form a group now …you will be targeted..
              Wait for the entry, and we come out of the woodwork..
              250 million fully armed citizens…
              250 thousand, UN…DHS…ICE…IRS…FBI…combined…
              Take my guns…3 or 4 less than later number…

            • Anonymous

              AMEN brother… If you form a group now …you will be targeted..
              Wait for the entry, and we come out of the woodwork..
              250 million fully armed citizens…
              250 thousand, UN…DHS…ICE…IRS…FBI…combined…
              Take my guns…3 or 4 less than later number…

              • legal citzen

                heck donating a few bucks to a tea party group gets you numbered by the feds. Just the other day the IRS had to pay 50,000 to a group that they “accidenlty” sent all thier info to liberal groups, names, address’s donations amounts. and then the liberal groups published this list of “enemies of the state” and went after them personlly.Showing up at thier homes and work ect.

            • helot

              Yes, Durango Kid, we are All fucked.

              It’s possible that some people may come out ok if they are lucky. But it’s likely most won’t. And it’s even more likely that None will be better off than they are now.

              \\P.s.
              You really gotta consider dropping that smug smiley face from your lame assed Capt. Picard Line of “Engage” You really come across as a sick f*ck, especially when you lay in the praise for the enforcers of the empire who lay waste to The People on a day to day basis.

              • Eagle 71

                Neg-a-tive waves, Moriarty (or, ‘helot’ in this case)…always with the neg-a-tive waves.

        • Mountain Trekker

          The Party Machine rolls on, the incumbent RINO wins again in Mississippi and the Tea Party goes down to defeat. I hear the voices of the idiots hollering for term limits as they vote for the incumbent again, that’s been in office for 30 years. Do we really expect different results with the same old RINO’s. Trekker Out.

          • hammerhead

            Mountain- from what i have read , cochran bussed in democrat voters for that run off vote.
            Nice , real nice.
            I have a feeling there will be alot of voter fraud in the upcoming mid-terms .
            Then watch the Obama machine hit high gear .
            As a lame duck he no longer has anything to lose.
            A very dangerous man , with all his Bloomberg and Soros money to back him .

          • Vicky

            It’s really discouraging. I got up extra early to read the election results and got such a sick feeling when I realized it was same-old, same-old.

        • Confederate

          I got 20 out of 30, not bad.

        • Anonymous

          Off the subject– but see! I told you so! The North American Union– that was the word I was tring to think of the other day when I wrote that the reason Obummer’s letting all the little Mexican tarts through the borders– its so we can all get together like one big family and destroy national boundaries.

          Basically, its about destroying local control. They want Centralization of Power like what happened in Europe when all the nations were destroyed and became the EU!(A few Oligarths controlling everything, telling everyone what to do, and stealing all the peoples’ assets). NWO!!

          Thats what I said the other day and now SGT report is saying the same thing!

        • Patrick

          Having spent the majority of the last 20 years away from my family, it was always in my mind to do for tomorrow, “just in case”.
          Any NYC “event”, and I was required to be on my way, if not already there.
          I would beg those of you hung up on politics to ignore as much as possible (with eyes wide open, of course)…these people are always nowhere to be found when the SHTF. Even showing up later with the check book, they’ll look to help their friends before they help you.
          YOU are your family’s best hope for comfort in a disaster, as well as that of your neighbors. Concentrate on that. If you hung every government schmo today, there’d be 10,000 sociopaths lined up to fill that void.
          Do good for yours, and you’ll be able to do good for others when the time comes.

      2. PWYPreach

        Daisy: Excellent humor…and I could personally identify with probably 29 of those (fine, 30).

        • Silver Lodge

          20 out of 30, guilty. And I don’t feel one bit guilty.

          • Da Yooper

            only 30

            slackers

      3. Old Nam Vet

        On the dehydration of food. I do it but don’t even use a dehydrator… Guess…

        • jerrytbg

          All right I’ll bite, an old van?

          On Daisy’s list.. I see a training manual in the making…

          🙂

      4. Canada Canuk

        Hey Daisy, GREAT article! family members have told me I have some ‘strange’ places of storing food, and wonder if i’m opening a ‘Bulk food store’ (:

        I must admit that sometimes I have a problem finding certain food that I have hidden ‘in strange places’….but I did find those egg noodles (after 3 months) take care, hugs to you and the little one. CC

        • IMPCALGI

          @ canuck

          I’ve been working on a database program that will keep track of items and where they are stored, when bought, etc etc. It would be totally stand alone; no net connections at all. Just about impossible to hack it with anything but a hatchet 🙂

          Ideals Mastering Power Creating All Life GOD IS

      5. Jim in Va.

        Damn, I’m a crazy terrorist/prepper and didn’t know it! My parents who went through the depression taught me how to weather events. I guess they were terrorists too but didn’t live long enough to find out. You think they would have caught my dad before he fought in WW2 and surely arrested my mom while she was canning and baking. Should I turn myself in?

        • buttcrackofdoom

          like i’ve said before…there wasn’t a person in the WORLD before your grandparents that WASN’T a prepper…it’s only the last 2 or 3 generations that decided they could spend their income out two or three years(and WAY beyond that), and it would all work out for ’em. so far, so BAD, i say. look out BELOOOWWWWW!

          • clint hospo

            That’s true! So many people have no idea how to hunt fish, can food or do many survival skills. Tell that professor Dickie to leave his comments to himself and his opinion. This is not an open forum. Did anyone tell him that yet? lol
            People to be honest when katrina happened yes people gave up and did not engage. I would take some gloves (if your worried) and load all your magazines without fingerprints on them. IF you feel after the fire is done, you can take HCL and soak your guns for a couple of days in a plastic container and it will rust the crap out of the groves inside the barrel to unrecognize the grove pattern. Have weapons in different rooms loaded and ready. I’m using a 12 gauge benelli m2 with an extended tube for anyone coming thru the clutter I made in my front door where someone could not rush in quickly. Hell a couple of bicycles piled with a few things on top with stop a weighted and unbalanced team for a few sec to be “tripped up”. Some of you know what I’m saying. Wear earplugs and earmuffs for flashbangs, will really help if it happens to you. Remember in Iraq we shot some bad guys with full metal jacket in the chest and it does not necessarly stop people like in the movies. # shots to a guys chest and he was running away, 2 shots into a guy thru a car window and he was still moving fine. So its shot placement to the head or the heart. Sure they will die sooner than later but not at the moment in all cases.
            Have confidence in yourself and practice with your weapons around your home to know different situations with family etc. You have a huge advantage if you are not sleeping in your own home within reason. Of course your not going to take out a whole group of 10 intruders with helmets and kevlar unless you got 10lbs of tannerite in a container with a pipe filled with gunpoweder/blackpowder with wires running to it with a resister that overheats when a current is ran to it hooked to a remote 10 dollar christmas light or some crazy crap that you hear people doing. These people are sick that want violence and want to attack good people in this country. People just want to spend time with their kids and time with neighbors etc but you got these unlawful idiots always trying to hurt people.

            • TLBaby

              Ever try running or even walking on slick magazines? Worse than ice. Have a stack by each entry to throw down.

              • rockelle

                Sorry, accidentally hit thumbs down….meant up!

              • WHoWuddaThunkIt

                You mean like a 1/2 Inch 4×8 Plywood sheet on both sides of all your doors with 2-1/2″ Drywall screws facing up every 3 inches apart and laying flat on the porch and nailed down. As the first intruder falls in pain the others behind him fall on top. And Or, Just Get a few hundred feet of barbed wire and Re-rod. Drive the 2 Ft rods into the ground and wrap the barbed wire all around them in figure 8’s in the front yard then spray paint them flat green and use Conibear 330’s between the wires if they try to set foot down. Tangle feet at 3 AM in the dark No knock invasions will slow them down. Charred broken glass and glass marbles, scattered all over your front porch, makes a fun entry. Just make sure you post your No Trespassing Sign, warnings. And post Quarantine Eboli Infested Home sign on your door. They will look for softer targets. Your greatest weapon is creativity and imagination.

        • still playing in the mud

          It bothers my wife when people come over and say ” my grandmother did that” when they see her canning. Confirms they or their parents are not doing any planning. Danny , Zebulon, nc

          • Vicky

            I know. Nobody else cans food and they simply can’t understand why I’d want to stand over a hot stove instead of going to “the casino” with them. As if! We’re not from here, so they already think we’re odd. Not dangerous, just odd. This comes from the age forty and up group, and they go to the nearest casino about five times a week. For op-sec, I probably ought to go once, but it’s against my moral convictions and common sense. So I stay home and can in blissful isolation.

      6. Muleskinner

        You have enough salt to create another dead sea!

        • sixpack

          Your favorite drinking glass is a Mason jar.

      7. buttcrackofdoom

        My wife sat me down the other day for a talk. I say “talk”, it was her talking at me for two hours. did you guys realise that when men say they’re ‘spoken for’ that’s actually what they mean?

        • Anonymouse

          IN keeping with Daisy’s humor, a slightly humorous but true story along the same lines as your wife’s “talk” between husbands and wives:

          To set the stage, my beloved spouse has OCD, bless his heart, because of Vietnam and is understandably upset when it comes to how our government is treating veterans. That said, I had just called my congressman to complain about an issue and after ending the call, I proceeded to the kitchen to fix my Cheerios. My spouse followed me and began to rant and rail against the fact that contacting our Congressmen and women does no good and only singles us out, blah, blah, blah. “Why do you bother?,” he growled.

          Fearing that this “sermon” would take a good part of my morning, I stealthily snuck a dry Cheerio out of my bowl and let gravity do its thing. Mid-rant, my husband hears the Cheerio ping off the “you could do surgery on it” floor, which then bounces somewhere into the matching-Cheerio-colored beige, thick carpet. Said rant immediately ceases and his hunt for Cheerio begins.

          Smiling, off I go with my bowl of Cheerios. Life is good!

          • helot

            RE: “contacting our Congressmen and women does no good and only singles us out,”

            Yeah, it’s Not, “blah, blah, blah”

            I guess you didn’t get the memo: We’re in a Freaking Police State!

            • PWYPreach

              Helot: It most usually IS blah, blah, blah when you are preaching to the choir.

            • WTVR

              Helot — What did you do today to try to fix things other than criticize the author of a humorous anecdote?

              Everybody who reads this site knows we are in a “police state.” Do you really have to be so intense every second of every day? If so, then they have already won.

          • Waiting

            It is not “OCD” it is “CDO”, in alphabetical order as it should be.

        • BigB

          I get that “talk” about every two months. However I have found away around this whole stigma of being a prepper. I now tell anyone in my family that thinks what I do is odd that this is my hobby. For some reason this seems to pacify those critics.

          What I don’t get is how prepping for a major SHTF event is bad but having a hobby that keeps me busy is OK. WTF?

          BigB

          • buttcrackofdoom

            and MY wife is one of the WORST! she thinks there’s no way anything bad can happen….her head’s so far up her ass, they’re gonna hafta cut switchback trails to find it. marriage is like going to the auction, you never know what yer gonna bring home til you get it there…

            • sixpack

              Many men prefer to inspect the box before they bid…

              • buttcrackofdoom

                like my mama always told me “if you like the milk, BUY THE FUKIN’ COW!

                • sixpack

                  But5 does that mean you can’t check under the hood first?

                  • buttcrackofdoom

                    the devil takes MANY forms, sixpack!!LOL

        • passinwiththewind

          I know what you mean, bcod.

          I took the little woman and our/her friend on a long weekend vacation to the mountains. While sitting around the campfire the first evening, I was in the middle of their conversations about menopause and pets dying.

          I said to myself, “WTF,this is supposed to be a fun time.”

          I was bombarded with emotional, buzz killing crap, for almost an hour before making the realization I was in the direct path of “Hormonal Mass Ejection”.

          So, a bit of advice to all the men in a similar situation; do as I did, when the HME is coming towards you, slip away, to go organize the fishing gear.

          PWTW

          • buttcrackofdoom

            my wife’s got really demanding lately. she insists i kiss her ring whenever she walks into a room. i wouldn’t mind it so much, but why does she hafta keep the ring in her back POCKET!

            • Miss DeeDee

              BC o Doom,
              Eppe would be proud of you !!!!
              Miss Dee Dee

              • buttcrackofdoom

                i didn’t REALLY understand when i said “til DEATH do us part”, it was a COMMITMENT! now i know why men die before women…it’s because we WANT TO.

        • WHoWuddaThunkIt

          Or when the Girlfriend says “We need to talk” You know you are in trouble, or they need more of a commitment on your part. Either way you are to listen only, as they talk. Or just run…

          A few of the best ones I heard lately were:

          If a man is alone in the woods without his wife, is he still wrong? &

          When a man opens the car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife. lol

          • Nopittypartyhere

            When I tell my husband ‘we need to talk’ he wonders what catastrophe I’m wanting to
            Prep for now!

      8. buttcrackofdoom

        ― Milton Berle“You can lead a man to Congress, but you can’t make him think.”

      9. Grafique

        31 – You have a forest’s worth of firewood stacked and seasoned.

        • Da Yooper

          at least & i own a forest

        • passinwiththewind

          A very, very, important part of prepping in the “grand scheme of things”. Especially, if you don’t own a small forest like Da Yooper and myself.

          And… some are saying…. “I don’t even own a woodstove, so why would i need a stockpile of firewood?”

          And… I say…. “Yea, but; you do have to cook and stay warm”.

          Considering those two points, a nice pile of seasoned firewood would be real nice if an EMP event takes place or terrorists nuke the nearest power plant.

          Short of having a big generator and massive underground, hidden fuel reserves, everyone at some point will definitely need “fire”.

      10. grandee

        how about when you take your re-stock grocery list with you to the store cause:

        you eat what you store
        and
        store what you eat.

        and nobody in the house better take something off the pantry shelf without marking it down on the re-stock grocery store list !!

        • NetRanger

          Ah! Another one of my Spirko cousins speaks!

          …amen. EWYS/SWYE

          Been doing that since 2009. I started buying a little extra here an there. In two years the larder was overflowing. Im about to throw out a couple jars of mayo. Its the first ive had to pitch since i started.

          NOTICE: There are some products that you can go way past the “best by” date. Mayo is NOT one of them.

          • sixpack

            I just opened and am using a jar of mayo, at almost exactly one year past the BB date. It is fine.

            I have plenty of space in my refrigerator, so I keep my mustard, mayo, pickles and other condiment stores, lined up on the lower shelves, instead of on a shelf in the pantry. It seems to greatly extend their shelf life. No sense in not extending shelf life while you can, by keeping the stuff cool now.

      11. G19TMBRWLF

        Sign # 31: You’re in laws see you as “strange” because you can’t join in their conversations that always center around sports or reality TV– you fear they will be the ones who turn you in when SHTF.

        • WHoWuddaThunkIt

          When SHTF; In-laws or Outlaws – Be wary of both.

      12. Sideshow

        32: Your kids know how to don a gas maskin 30 seconds…

        • sixpack

          33. You can “re-purpose” almost anything.

      13. the renegade braveheart

        Great article, Daisy. I fit most of those criteria. I’m a prepper and proud of it. I don’t care what anyone thinks of it.

        • y99

          Brave, gotta say, almost none of that applies to me at all…no really.

          • the renegade braveheart

            Y99, don’t mean this like it sounds, but a true prepper would meet as much of that criteria as possible.

            • y99

              Done and more…I think…just…can’t remember;)

      14. Sgt. Dale

        Daisy:
        Good Job!
        Don’t tell anyone but, I’m a CRAZY PREPPER. Oh I’ve been doing this for about 30 years now. Thank God I did when I lost my job in 1984 tell 1986. We had around 1 1/2 years worth of food and I’m a good hunter so I could put meat on the table. I also reloaded ammo to take the game.
        So I’m proud to be a PREPPER!!!
        I have a number 32 Two of the same firearms.
        2 Ar15
        2 M1a’s
        2 1911
        2 S&W 5904
        2 12Ga.
        You see where I’m going.

        A.S.M.S.
        Sgt.

        • Sgt. Dale

          OK make it #33
          Sgt.

          • sixpack

            34. You ALWAYS have a spare for everything…there is no such thing as “extra.”

        • TTC

          Sgt. Dale- Pray tell? Why did you lose your job?
          Just one more question- Is there a “police Data
          Base” where one can find Rogue Officers’ who may
          have, ahem, Re-located?
          TTC

          • Sgt. Dale

            TTC
            I worked at Thatcher Glass in Streator Ill. from 1970 to 1984. They closed the factory and I lost my job, that was when I became a Cop.

            As for the DATA base I don’t know for sure. One way to tell is if they have had jobs in several different department. Saying this I know a several Cops that have changed department to make more money.

            What do you mean by rogue?

            If a cop is arrest for a felony, and convicted he is or she is out. If they commit a misdemeanor, they will have to pay the fine like anyone else, and it would be hard for them to work in the same department. Sorry but truly I don’t know of any data base.
            Sgt.

            • helot

              One of saddest tales I’ve ever read (outside of those poor bastards in the Middle East or those dragged into Vietnam on either side) a common tale, which is even sadder still:

              “I worked at Thatcher Glass in Streator Ill. from 1970 to 1984. They closed the factory and I lost my job, that was when I became a Cop.”

              I noticed you didn’t say, “When I became a Peace Officer”.

              There Were other options, … and still are.

              • Vicky

                Being a policeman can still be an honorable job. They’re not all jack-booted thugs working for the Obama administration. In the smaller towns, they’re a beacon of stability, respected and well-liked. Big city cops are the pits, but they’re not all like that.

                • Sgt. Dale

                  Vicky
                  Thanks,
                  Pay no attention to the troll above.
                  I have yet to see it with a thought of its own.

                  Obullshit is the worst prez we have ever had. I can remember when Ike was the President. I was very young but I still remember setting on my father lap asking who was the President. When JFK and Nixon was running.
                  I would like to see the troll above get be in a argument with his neighbor next door over kids in the yard that broke something, and he will run like a little girl to the COPS.
                  I just see its name and I give it a thumbs down. Like dog poop on the ground I just walk around it.
                  Again thanks
                  Sgt.

                  • sixpack

                    I think this “helot” is a misspelling of “zealot”…or harlot.

        • buttcrackofdoom

          i aint got no guns…they got stolen……no, really!

          • TPSnodgrass

            Mine were not stolen, the canoe they were in, along with ALL of my ammunition, were lost, when the canoe swamped. Really, it was heartbreaking, water was way too deep for anyone to try and retrieve them. I’ve been trying to work hard to get up the courage to replace them, but, alas! No such luck at all. I do have a stellar Louisville Slugger for each member of the family though, we go to the “batting cages”, (yeah, that’s it!) a few times each month to practice our batting skills, just in case we need to play baseball….a lot.

        • EH

          2 is 1 and 1 is none!

      15. Johnny

        Look I made it onto the governments “honor role” list. I wonder what I will get as a reward. I’m up for 223 ammo, or maybe a small donkey. Just cause

      16. Warchild Dammit!

        #34,you wear the label of paranoid/tin foil hat wearing/prepper/firearm loving wild eyed survivalist in training with pride.

        • LSB

          #35 when the current article and comments are so stimulating that you feel as tho we are all brothers and sisters in a common cause.

          • y99

            We are brothers and sisters because most on here have submitted to a higher power, we get to know each other.

            I can tell you that if six months into a collapse, if a person identifies themselves by their on-line name I’ll help them.

            • slingshot

              y099

              I will ask, Who is Bertha? Better have the right answer.

          • the renegade braveheart

            Warchild and LSB, those 2 criteria fit me.

      17. River Rat

        Off Topic:
        I saw a plane I hadn’t seen in over 40yrs today and it landed at my small air-field across the way about 2mi. It was on the ground maybe 10 min. An OV-10 Bronco gray in color and no markings flew right over the house at maybe 150 AGL. When it took off it headed West. Strange!

        River Rat at the ready!!! NOMI///MOLON LABE!

        • Juliet6

          RR – Serviced those at Bien Hoa towards the end of my tour. Cool birds with multiple uses. Fly an old super up 1969 A150K with 150hp these days. Just enough bird to get about 2 miles up away from nearest idiot..LOL

          Salute to you! Watch your six, not just the bush these days. I fear the Trojan Horse has emptied its contents.

        • The Old Coach

          Wonder who has the inclination and the money to manage the upkeep on one of those?

          • River Rat

            Well my guess the Government.

            River Rat at the ready!!! NOMI///MO:OM LABE!

        • passinwiththewind

          Speaking of “strange” and flying objects, it reminded me of an event that happened last week.

          We were at the mountain retreat, where our garden, horses, and other goods for the main BO location is; and a helicopter was off in the valley below, flying at a slow speed.

          I had just finished working in and around the barn, it was mid-day and hot. We were running late for an appointment, so i ran in the house and shucked the sweaty clothes to get a shower.

          The little woman was in the garden so I ran quickly outside to tell her she had about ten minutes before needing to come in for her shower so we could leave.
          As i approached the garden, naked, (no neighbors nearby- thank God), she says, “what is that helicopter doing nearby”? I said, “the National Guard usually flies this area in summer looking for Marijuana patches”.

          About that time, the darn thing came around the mountain, and over my tree tops and slowed over the garden, with a person hanging out the side, holding some electronic gear to his head. Upon seeing us in the open, they quickly buzzed away.

          The little woman says, “WTF was that, it wasn’t a green National Guard chopper?” I said, “No, it was a State Highway Patrol chopper that the county/state sometimes hires to search for pot patches.”

          The little woman laughed and said, “All they got to see was a bunch of green bean plants and your hanging grub worm”.

          I replied, “Nix the hanging grub, cause they don’t have ultra-zoom on that camera”.

          True story.

          A friend of mine confirmed that they were flying around the county, cause he read a little article in the local newspaper about it. We never buy a local paper cause it is nothing much, but irrelevant bullshit

          • Vicky

            This story isn’t funny, but it’s true, as unlikely as it sounds. We, and our daughter and son-in-law, have noticed a small (really small) black helicopter following the electric lines, about ten feet over them, then criss-crossing the fields. This has to be a one-man only machine and it’s really loud. It comes over about three times a week and doesn’t pause or hover, just travels at way below what I would consider legal limit. We have two “neighbors” who parasail and they’re fun to watch, but they have no idea who might be flying this thing. Any ideas?

            • VRF

              Helicopters don’t have a lower limit to their altitude like fixed wind aircraft , also that copter is probably working for the power company surveying the power lines they also have equipment on board to test for line leaks

              I worked for a power company as a contractor on most of their hangar needs , they had a few bell jet rangers to work the towers and lines for surveys of condition on the lines and towers

              • VRF

                “Fixed wing” aircraft
                Stupid smart phone thinks it knows what I wanted to type , but was wrong

              • WHoWuddaThunkIt

                VRF- That is not true, FYI- Helicopters have a Min of 500 Ft Above any structures on the ground. Check your VFR Yellow Sectional Maps, and as described in Title 14; Part 91.119 Safe Minimum Altitudes. What the Power companies have to fly below that 500 Ft Min to inspect power lines are Waivers issued by the FAA to wave these low flights below the minimum, under Title 14; Part 91.119. All fixed Aircraft must maintain a Min of 1000 Ft above populated cities as described in “Part 91.119(b)Congested Areas” and as listed as Yellow color on the VFR Yellow sectional Maps. Check your area’s VFR Maps for this info. so if the Aircraft has engine trouble, they can safely glide to an area out of the populated area to crash land. Helicopters have a more vertical landing and can pick a vacant field thus they can use the 500 Ft Min. Just look up the FAR policy Part 91.

                • VRF

                  Well , what ever . I do know a helicopter can just about land any where the pilot deems safe
                  I’ve had one owned by a friend land in the parking lot of my business and pick me up
                  And no special permit or anything

                • VRF

                  (b) Over congested areas. Over any congested area of a city, town, or settlement, or over any open air assembly of persons, an altitude of 1,000 feet above the highest obstacle within a horizontal radius of 2,000 feet of the aircraft.

                  (c) Over other than congested areas. An altitude of 500 feet above the surface, except over open water or sparsely populated areas. In those cases, the aircraft may not be operated closer than 500 feet to any person, vessel, vehicle, or structure.

                  (d) Helicopters. Helicopters may be operated at less than the minimums prescribed in paragraph (b) or (c) of this section if the operation is conducted without hazard to persons or property on the surface. In addition, each person operating a helicopter shall comply with any routes or altitudes specifically prescribed for helicopters by the Administrator.

                  • VRF

                    Helicopters may be operated at less than the minimums prescribed in paragraph B or C of this section if the operation is conducted without hazard to persons or property on the surface

          • TTC

            “hanging grub worm” – I am so stealing that!

        • WHoWuddaThunkIt

          RR – How many bales did they drop off?

      18. Stan522

        You never tell Muggles what you do…..

      19. slingshot

        Everyone else is loading mags and your still shooting.

      20. bondgirl007

        1. My kitchen is stocked with non-electric versions of most appliances. 2. I think oil lamps in my house are beautiful. 3. I am willing to tear up a beautiful backyard for a turkey run.

        • grandee

          I have some of those beautiful oil lamps too, and a shelf full of lamp oil 🙂

          • Vicky

            What do you do to keep the oil fresh? We had a “black out” last winter, for over a week and I hauled out the Alladins for it. (Wood stove for heat, so we were comfortable.) The oil really smelled bad. I keep the lamp oil in the cellar, so it’s cool and out of the light. The oil containers are dated, and this one was from July of 1997. An Alladin lamp puts out enough light to read, but I’m buying black-out curtains because our nearest neighbors (about a quarter mile away) mentioned they could see our lights and wondered if we had power back on. ????

            • VRF

              Black out curtains
              , black spray paint when tshtf

              • WHoWuddaThunkIt

                Just buy a box of Plastic Heavy Duty Black Construction Bags, cut the sides or ends to fit the size of the window for night time OPSEC. Duct tape, stapler?

      21. AC

        You can’t have too many hand tools!

        I have a battery powered cordless hand drill, a corded hand drill, and a crank-powered breast drill.

        The battery powered drill always has dead batteries, and it takes 3 hours to charge them. I bought this one first.

        The corded drill is ok, but wrangling the extension cords can be a nuisance – especially if you’re only drilling a few holes. I bought this one when got sick of waiting three hours for the cordless drill to be usable.

        The crank-powered breast drill is always ready to use, and when you’re done it is ready to be put away immediately. I got this when I needed to drill holes where there was no access to electricity – but now that I have it, I use it the most.

        • Vicky

          Garrett-Wade, out of Ohio, has some amazing hand tools (and, no, I don’t have any financial ties to them.) and hand tools are the only reason I’ll go to a yard sale. Have found some really good things for my blacksmith husband.

        • whyteflyt

          Your supposed to have more than one battery.

      22. stewpedaso

        I guess I’m not a crazy prepper after all…I only said yes to 4 of those. 7. I am an EMT with PHTLS 10. Thats always been a thing standard and metrics 12. I hunt 19. CNN blows why would I not have alternative media. However…I could grab a small pack with some items and walk into the woods and you would never see or hear from me again.

        • Warchild Dammit!

          Uh Stew,a lot of folks walk into the woods with a pack never to be heard from again,not always a positive thing,just saying.

          • Stewpedaso

            Lay-nah-Kinch’-tee…Wah’-nee VVah-gay’-ning-tu.
            That’s Sioux/Lakota language
            “Those who forget thier mother are doomed to die”-Hopi proverb. My family will be fine out there.

      23. Ugly

        I am Spartacus !!!!

        • Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

          No, I am Spartacus !!!!

          • helot

            But, doesn’t Spartacus hate The Empire?
            Doesn’t he refuse to yield to the police of his time and see refuse to them as special or worthy of praise? No matter the uniform they wear, so long as the serve The Empire?

            There’s some guys here who Love the uniform of The Empire. Are you ok being at odds with them? For freedom’s sake?

          • Oathkeeper209

            NO! I AM SPARTACUS

          • WHoWuddaThunkIt

            No!! you are Gilligan,….The Skipper says so. It’s Maryann who thinks she is Ginger.

      24. Stan522

        My tinfoil hat collection comes in many shapes and sizes and I am so damn proud of them…. May the doubters perish in their denial!

      25. Archivist

        #35. More hard drives loaded with stuff than any other person or organization in the area. And trying to figure out how to afford more. [Egghead has 5 TB drives on sale under $200.]

        #36. More books on some subjects than a university library.

        #37. Old computers that can still run old software, just in case.

        • sixpack

          38. Boxes of old clothes might also be labeled “cleaning rags”,”bandages” or “toilet paper”.

      26. Chris45

        Yeah I think I’m in good company.

        • helot

          No, Chris45. You’re in mixed company.
          Beware.

          It’s easy to think otherwise.

      27. LSB

        #36
        when the current article and comments are so stimulating that you feel as tho we are all brothers and sisters in a common cause.

      28. Babycatcher55

        #36? Your close friends know you as the person to go to for “home remedy” ideas in case medical help isn’t available…. 😉

      29. j.veritas

        #19 Instead of CNN you have alternative news sites on your bookmarks

        How about # 31….Instead of alternative news sites, you started a website of your own…frontlineofdefense.com

      30. BAM

        WELL I GUESS SOME OF YOU ALL GOT TO SPEND YOUR MONEY SOME WHERE.

        YOU GOT A FEW GRAND YOU CAN GIVE ME.

      31. Satori

        off topic
        but SH_T gettin’ real in Arizona

        When Will Arizona Run Out of Water?

        http://noarizona.wordpress.com/2013/…-out-of-water/

        “And here’s the bad news in a nutshell: If you live in the Southwest or just about anywhere in the American West, you or your children and grandchildren could soon enough be facing an age of thirst, which may also prove to be the greatest water crisis in the history of civilization. No kidding.”

        Climate crisis: Arizona may run out of water in 6 years

        http://americablog.com/2014/06/clima…run-water.html

        “Arizona is bone dry, desiccated by the worst drought ever seen in the state’s 110-year long observational record. The Grand Canyon State has been in drought conditions for a decade, and researchers think the dry spell could hold out for another 20 to 30 years, says the City of Phoenix.”

        • helot

          It ‘may’ run out in six years.
          It ‘may’ rain a ton next year?
          Or, if you need it that bad, I may hop in my car and pull a trailer full of water from the Mississippi River straight to you.
          The Free Market can deliver.
          After all, you Do live in a desert area. That’s to be expected.

          • The Old Coach

            According to the people who watch the “El Nino” precursors in the Pacific, the big problem in the West next year may be flash flooding. Just sayin’

          • Satori

            there is evidence in the geological record that shows droughts lasting 100 years,300 years and even 500

            lets see the “free” market handle that !

            the free market can’t make water
            however they can TAKE it from someone else

            eg frackers vs. farmers

            high bidder wins

            if farmers win
            we keep eating
            but at a much higher price
            if farmers lose ???
            oil and bread sandwiches all around ?

            and the free market does such a good job
            that instead of paying $15 to fill my gas tank
            I now pay $60

            yee haw
            keep up the good work guys
            soon we’ll all be hitch hiking to work on donkey carts !

        • BigB

          But you notice Satori that not one new building permit has been denied? We have to stop building here in the West as there is not enough resources to handle the population we already have. But they wont because of the revenue building provides.

          BigB

          • Vicky

            And you have a bunch more illegals headed your way so you will have to “Share”.

        • kynase

          There are already cities in California that are dry too. What I find interesting is that MSM seems to ignore the universal plight of the drought. They mention it in passing, but IMO, are not diving into it.

      32. Socrates

        Chuck Norris does all of the above and more… while blindfolded.

        We love ya Daisy, great article! 🙂

      33. Sierra Dave

        I ordered 8 pounds of tea online. 200 bags per pound. Cotton bags with no strings or staples. Some are without bags and need a teaball. $80 or 5 cents per bag.

        None of that inexpensive Lipton. I got Earl Grey, Peppermint, Lemon Mint, and a few others.

        Buy bulk!

        • incognito

          Copy that SD. I’ve noticed long looks from others walking through Sam’s Club after my shopping habits changed over the years. People just don’t understand why someone would need 6-50lb bags of dog food in their cart. I sport sunglasses and a jungle hat when shopping these days.

        • Warchild Dammit!

          Earl Grey Dave?!You must be broke like the clintons to afford such things,getting 200 thou a speech again are you!?

          • passinwiththewind

            Can you believe that forked tongue lying medussa bitch?

            She claimed in an interview, about her book, that her and Bill left the Whitehouse,broke, unable to afford payments on their house mortgages, or Chelsea’s college tuition. I call bullshit!

            Just before the election of ’08, it was reported that Bill showed a net worth of over 100 million and Billery was about 52 mil. That’s, Just what they “showed”.

            It just goes to show, we are nearing the very last days; when the masses are willing to put more con artists in the Whitehouse; for a second time, no less.

            Come quickly, sweet Jesus; our redemption is thirsting.

            • VRF

              Yep the US will end up looking just like Detroit
              Because what you said above is exactly what was done in that city
              Kept reelecting the same crooks to power and putting the same crooks into positions of money and power

        • unknown suspect

          No… Buy Lipton to trade, buy good tea for yourself.

        • The Old Coach

          I’d love to see HIS preps.

          • WHoWuddaThunkIt

            Somebody needs to hack into that pacemaker and shut it down.

            • The Old Coach

              Philistine. During the Bush II administration, Cheney was the only adult in the room.

        • Gregory8

          Satori: He should know, he and his merry band were the ones that orchestrated the last attack. There are no Democrats and Republicans, only the HAVES-them, and the HAVE NOTS-the rest of us. They ran their scam in Iraq and it’s failed, so now we’re all going to pay for their blunder. They wanted to get rich, and they did, along with their ‘friends’ who sell war and reconstruction supplies and equipment. Along with the free flow of oil from the 4th biggest producer, they were all making money hand over fist but and uninvited guest crashed the party-ISIS, and thy are pissed! TPTB are scared silly because they are getting a foretaste of what folks here will do when they too realize that they’ve been had by these power/money hungry bastards. As we speak, they are busy building their underground bunkers and filling them with supplies. Some of them have already set up retreats in other counties because they don’t believe that they’ll be safe anywhere here in the U.S. They gambled their fortunes with our freedoms and with the lives of our brave young men and women.

        • VRF

          Basically he is admitting that they are getting things in place for this to happen

      34. LoWang

        I’m an American, a Veteran, a gun owner, and a Christian, I’m on so many lists it’s creepy. :0

        • VRF

          And , not alone .. Is the other list were on
          Hang tuff

      35. not average

        You know your a prepper when… duct tape and bailing wire will get you out of most problems… oh wait, maybe that’s a redneck..oops

        • helot

          RE: “when… duct tape and bailing wire will get you out of most problems…”

          Imho, that makes you a farmer.

          Oh wait, that’s criminal too, I forgot. Mon-Saint_Santo. says so too.

          Test something:

          Monsatan?

      36. Burt Gummer

        A Prezy Crapper does not know the meaning of enough.

        • Socrates

          @Satori

          The rabbit hole goes even deeper if you care to look.
          Much more to the mysteries than just OOPARTS.

          Read this book if you can, more to the past than you ever thought possible.

          h t tp://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0967816254?ie=UTF8&tag=pegasreseacon-20&link_code=as3&camp=211189&creative=373489&creativeASIN=0967816254

      37. DarrenR

        Your children carry a modified bug-out kit in their school backpacks…

        and they HOMEschool!

        • ENFP

          Right. Home school should be on that list!

      38. helot

        RE: “and they HOMEschool!”

        Love your sentiment.

        I had a long winded reply, but i accidentally hit the “Back” button and somehow my content disappeared.

        It’s a good, no, it’s a Great thing that you’re seemingly not teaching your children the way of empire and whoreshipping those who wear a uniform as if they were a god.

        • sixpack

          “I had a long winded reply, but i accidentally hit the “Back” button and somehow my content disappeared.”

          Lucky us.

        • DarrenR

          “it’s a Great thing that you’re seemingly not teaching your children the way of empire and whoreshipping those who wear a uniform as if they were a god.”

          agreed w the sentiment, though it makes things very hard.

          uniform in itself had legit function: that’s a policeman. when you are lost & see a policeman, it is safe to ask them for assist. that other uniform means that guy is from the electric company. so it’s ok if you see him climbing up pole in backyard. uniform on man in airport means it’s ok for him to take & put our bags on the cart.

          except the waters are horrifically muddied these days. not only can the cop or service person be totally unfit to wear uniform of any kind (except for jail stripes), but the uniform can be stolen. isn’t that great? criminals can steal or make swat team uniforms and do home invasion ‘under color of authority’.

          most trying, most confusing, most INTERESTING times we are in. can only thank God for Bible to help make sense of it.

          btw: teach younger children to seek out a mother with other children if they get separated, lost, or need help.

      39. lost karma

        OK, this is just for fun.

        You know you are a prepper/survivalist if…

        – your mother calls you to ask what’s “really going on” in the news

        – you’ve been invited to lead the neighborhood watch, even though you’re not a member

        – you know which manhole covers are storm water and which are sewer better than your municipal government

        – you name your cat “Sutures”

        – you teach the farmer’s kid how to kill and dress a hog

        – every zip lock bag is reused 15 times before becoming a .22 ammo pouch

        – you have more than three ways to cook dinner if the power goes out

        – you make up passwords the NSA can’t crack

        – you don’t count the seasons by summer, fall, winter or spring…but by deer, rabbit, squirrel and turkey

        – your wife and kids bitch that you never share the .50 cal.

        – you are on a first name basis with all Mennonites in area

        – your house is a Faraday Cage

        – the gun store calls to make sure you are okay because you haven’t been in for a couple weeks

        – First Blood and Red Dawn are basic training films for your family

        – you know the range to every house, tree or blade of grass in your neighborhood

        – you’re worried your kids violent video-games aren’t educational, because they “lack realism”

        – you view family reunions as a chance to standardize ammunition calibers

        – you have long since accepted the idea that if you’re not on someone’s list, you’re probably not doing it right

        – your wallet has at least four methods of payment at any given time

        – you memorized “101 Practical Uses for Machetes”

        – your 7 year old talks to you in Morse Code and knows that AR and AK are not state abbreviations

        – you push elevator buttons with a knuckle so you don’t leave a fingerprint

        – local gangbangers won’t come anywhere near you

        – you are certain there will come a day when clean water is worth more than gold

        – you’re kids and dogs instinctively know when to freeze in place

        – you actually get disappointed when the electricity comes back on

        – you think a girl wearing a gas mask is hot

        – you watch an apocalypse movie and can identify the gear they are using

        – the flowers you give your wife on anniversaries are edible

        – you killed the clothing you are wearing

        – your kids’ Halloween haul is stockpiled for future calories

        – pirates buried less treasure then you

        – you don’t allow you kids to have friends over for a sleep-ins for OPSEC concerns

        – you’re a mystery to everyone in the neighborhood but you know their social security numbers, employment history, and where they were born; the internet is a wonderful resource

        – you check for expiration dates not in months, but in years

        – you’re a guest lecturer for SEAL Team 6

        – your blood pressure spikes at the sound of “UN”

        – you have more homemade knives than your local prison

        – you are irritated with a car salesman because he doesn’t know what “EMP proof” means

        – if you have ever chipped a tooth on birdshot while eating dinner

        – you keep your family pets well fed “just in case”

        – you have thermite on your hard drives

        – you are called for a teacher parent conference, over your child’s lunch box being an ammo can

        – you have a three bed, two bath tent

        • Vicky

          Ha, Ha! Awesome!!!

          • sixpack

            Add the two lists together and it’s almost covered.

        • TPSnodgrass

          OUTFREAKINGSTANDING!! Thank you!

        • unknown suspect

          Code compliance keeps showing up to talk with you about your LPG tank farm out in the back 40.

          You rotate your ammo stock through the local gun shop.

          You and the family show up to a mass casualty exercise playing the part of “good Samaritans” and your kids do a better job of evaluating and treating casualty’s than the EMTs.

          You’re on the authorized list to utilize the local PDs’ “tire house”.

        • Archivist

          You need a remote for the thermite.

          I don’t bother with social security numbers, but I try to know everything else about area people, including how they are all related to each other.

      40. Mailguy

        My ex has always been in denial. Her family is about who has the best sob story gets the most attention instead of exceptinalism. My kids don’t live with me. I see them every other weekend. Don’t know if they’ll be with me when SHTF or not so I went ahead and gave secret preps to them just in case. They both have told me, “if it goes down, we’re coming here (dads)” LOL. If they can’t make it and I can’t get to them, they have their instructions and my daughter has told me that if “mom” doesn’t go along she’s going to tell her, “SHUT UP and DRIVE!”. I’m very proud of my kids. They’ll handle SHTF better than their ‘adult’ mother!

      41. Npgh

        As I read the article and comments, thinking to myself…”self, your are officially a domestic terrorist by the government standards.” I am watching my other half squash bugs on the inside door window. I just thought that bug bombs would be a good thing to add to my preps. I don’t want my house over-run with the “little nasties” when the shtf.

      42. Killer

        #32 You have enough Jerry cans full of gasoline to fill a super tanker.

      43. Be informed

        This is exactly why every place should have drone hunting.

        http://www.cnn.com/video/?/video/us/2014/06/24/dnt-drone-peeping-woman-apartment.kiro&hpt=hp_c3&from_homepage=yes&video_referrer=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.cnn.com%2F#/video/us/2014/06/24/dnt-drone-peeping-woman-apartment.kiro

        Some nice bird shot or buck shot for a larger drone this close would take care of these pervert’s drone trying to look in on this woman.

        The law simply is designed to protect the drones, not the right to privacy of every single person. Time to have BOUNTY on drones.

        • slingshot

          #4 shot does well. Good patterns and fucks shit up.

      44. VRF

        Some how I’m getting blocked from accessing this site
        If I go on my smart phone thru the cell tower I can get on
        But if I go thru a wifi connection I’m blocked from accessing this site
        Never changed a dam thing on my pc or server or modem

        • WHoWuddaThunkIt

          VFR – Its the “Thought Police” choosing what you will read or view. Never go on WiFi Period. or Never do any Online Banking on WiFi at all ever.

        • sixpack

          Check with your service provider, they may be blocking your access through their service?

      45. Poon Tang

        Here it is. The revised first quarter GDP. Down almost 3%. Obamacare wipes out the economy. And all the big increases in cost haven’t even started yet! The end is truly near. More food and more ammo, now. I lost 15 pounds, so far. Will lose 20 more in the next few months. Can’t afford to get sick. There won’t be any medical care available.

        • Satori

          wow
          that is a SERIOUS decline

          and just wait awhile until the REAL figures come out !

          • Gonetoolong

            Factor in inflation and it is much worse. New dollar vs. old dollar and it is a joke. Fundamental change is coming.

        • KY Mom

          I read that article too. Even using the “official government figures”, they are showing the collapse in GDP.

          Here Is The Reason For The Total Collapse In Q1 GDP

          “the real reason for today’s epic collapse in GDP was, you guessed it, Obamacare.”

          “Between the second and final revision of Q1 GDP something dramatic happened: instead of contributing $40 billion to real GDP in Q1, Obamacare magically ended up subtracting $6.4 billion from GDP. This, in turn, resulted in a collapse in Personal Consumption Expenditures as a percentage of GDP to just 0.7%, the lowest since 2009!.”

          http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2014-06-25/here-reason-total-collapse-q1-gdp

      46. Buckshot

        Love this stuff Daisy!

        #89 Everyone in your immediate family got lifetime memberships to Front Sight Firearms Academy for Christmas.
        #90 If everyone in your immediate family has been to FS more than once.
        #91 Your County Sheriff asks you for shooting lessons.
        #92 You have a “Dutch Oven Day party.
        #93 You know it’s exactly 340 yards to your Obama loving neighbors front porch.

      47. Satori

        and right on schedule
        and predictable as hell

        US Claims Syria Launches Airstrikes In Iraq

        http://www.activistpost.com/2014/06/us-claims-syria-launches-airstrikes-in.html#more

        I guess the State Department propaganda expert forgot to mention

        wait for it
        wait for it
        WAIT FOR IT

        weapons of mass destruction !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

        oh well
        probably be in the next propaganda report
        stay tuned

      48. swinging richard

        If a 3% decline in the economy is reported you can bet the true figures are much worse. Grain prices are dropping, so you expect larger crop yields. Takes much longer to replenish livestock herds though. Drought still effecting California produce. Feels like food inflation is coming.

      49. River Rat

        A heads up just now 11:35 am CST. Straight over head at about 5K AGL was a 3 plane flight of A-10’s heading due west. I field glassed them to make sure what they were. Wasn’t the A 10 retired a while back bring them out now something is up! Two days ago an OV- 10 now 3 A- 10’s, I call WTF OVER. Spotted a few miles east of St. Louis and no not from Scott AFB.

        River Rat at the ready!!! NOMI ///MOLON LABE!

      50. Trtailer Park Investor

        Now I ask you “wasn’t it Homeland Security that TOLD Americans to prepare for food shortages and power outages”. So NOW we do what they say and NOW they criminalize the very thing they tell us to do.
        Mixed signals from Washington.
        Just call me Jose.
        Everybody better brush up on your Spanish cause it’s gonna become the standard language of America as English will be dumped one day soon, if Obummer has his way.

      51. Barn Cat

        31. I have 1500 gallons of water stored in my basement.

        I wouldn’t seem like a prepper if you didn’t know what I had stored. I don’t wear camo, have a garden, practice bugging out, have enough solar power to run a small city, worry about chemtrails or fluoride or talk about OPSEC. I don’t share Facebook items that advocate armed revolution.

      52. Nobody

        TO SUM IT UP…YOU KEEP SHAKING YOUR HEAD SAYING (TO YOUR SELF) “THIS IS INSANE.” “NOBODY SHOULD HAVE TO BE STOCKPILING THIS MUCH CRAP!”…PROBLEM IS,IT IS NOT YOUR SANITY YOU ARE QUESTIONING!!!

        • wrong

          I smashed my finger in my truck door yesterday. I know. Stupid dumb ass…… Anyway, I spent just under 3 hours in Emergency yesterday morning getting it put back together. 6 Stitches inside 8 outside. X ray and a nice finger splint that sticks out so I can wack it on things.

          $1967.50 !!!!!!!!

          Un fucking real!

      53. Hard Justice

        When the power goes out, a good option to do laundry is a “Wonderwash” look for it, its a manual.

        • sixpack

          I use a bucket with my hand as an agitator. That’s the ghetto version of a “wonderwash”

      54. Later...

        Have you noticed Daisy never comments to her audience any more?
        Not here, Not at The Daily Sheeple, Not at the Activist Posts, Not even on her own web site!
        Why is that?
        Later…

        • sixpack

          What’s your point? Are we supposed to feel snubbed or something, because I don’t. I figure she’s busy with something else—like her real life.

      55. Anonymous

        Phone home petunia. Your great great uncle left me three producing oil wells.

      56. Esser Agaroth

        This is great! I got like 20.

        Another activity for kids is showing them hidden and not so hidden edible plants growing in your local area.

        “Training” and “practice” can never start too early.

        Fire drills and earthquake drills start pretty early, right?

        Same thing. 😉

      57. Tabitha

        All of your firearms fire multiple calibers.

      58. Raven Rostov

        You want to know how to survive? Or you think that Uncle Sam is going to be there to change your pants when the SHTF. No, no, you need uncle spam not Sam, and more. Get a manual written by a Russian who survived the implosion of the Soviet Union. This is written for Americans about ready to be left up the river without a paddle. Believe me this is cheap or free at AMAZON, it’s called Yankee Anti-Zombie Survival Manual, it gets right down to facts, 101 rules to save your self and family. This Russian has seen and smelled TSHTF in his own country. Only experience can be transferred. Read and survive!

      59. Raven Rostov

        You have to be crazy not to be a prepper. Don’t wait until the SHTF. But don’t try to convince the people who believe the single bullet theory that took away Kennedy. All the political and economic indicators point to the inevitable conclusion that sooner, not later the S will HTF. If you’re intelligent enough to understand the acronym you have the possibility of mitigating the nasty circumstances your politicians have created. The citizens voted these mentally disturbed beings into office and are partially responsible for the deadly mess they are faced with. Now you want to know how to survive. Or maybe your head is still deeply stuck up your own ignoble orifice, and you actually think that Uncle Sam is going to be there to change your pants when the SHTF. No, no, when you find yourself starving you’re going to need uncle spam not Sam, and much more. Get a manual written by a Russian who survived the implosion of the Soviet Union. This is written for Americans who are about ready to be left up the river without a paddle. Believe me, this is cheap or free at AMAZON, it’s called Yankee Anti-Zombie Survival Manual, it gets right down to facts, 101 rules to save your self and family. This Russian has seen and smelled TSHTF in his own country. Only experience can be transferred. Read and survive. Your brain is your greatest asset, use it with the information provided.

      60. DogBoy

        Not a prepper. None of that apples to me except OpSec. Now Mr. Fed will you pleeese take me off your FEMA camp list?

      61. Saventry

        I am guilty of all of these but mostly 17,18, 21,23,25 &26.

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